Time to Begin to Hone Our Sword of Equality As my task tracking software pops up a reminder that this paper is due in another week, a feeling of panic runs over my being trying to determine what did I learn? It was at that moment I realized, I didn’t get anything out of this class to strengthen my evangelism or testimony. It was that moment when I asked myself what more could I have done? I read the texts; I was present and active in the video conferences, I did everything I needed to to get to this point. Yet, I have nothing to write about whatsoever. I thought just write about each question and answer them. Ask more questions, find something anything. However, the sad reality is I have no different feelings about my evangelism and ministry. I have always been told my preaching style is very evangelic. Sharing my testimony and how it is presented have not changed, and I do not feel that Lillian did anything to shore up testimonies in general. Do I feel that this course was a waste? Not exactly, there was a lot to learn and bring to light, primarily I found out about the “nones” and interaction with them. This information was valuable, and I guess it did help with my testimony, by giving me different perspectives on people’s thought process. I continue to sit here and ponder what did I learn there had to be more. Maybe I heard something completely abstract from the intended purpose. Maybe I learned how to be a better storyteller, someone who can captivate people with stories of my adventures. In Chapter two of When “Spiritual But Not Religious” is Not Enough, Lillian talks about Pete. Pete is someone I can relate to, someone that I can say I have been where he has been. That is what I learned that my stories may be insignificant to some and maybe to even myself, but my story may help someone else. As I reread the story of Pete, I knew the entire story and knew how it ended, yet my eyes watered up again just like they did the first time. This is my story, that is the beginning of my sermon for next week. A sermon that speaks of surrendering it all to God, my story of my transformation, a story of my surrendering. I may even share parts of Pete with my story. Back to the nones, I feel that the nones are the most integral part of this entire course. By understanding who the nones are, now I feel that I can evangelize better to them. So in retrospect, it would appear I did get something more out of this course than previously thought. I have all of these nones in my life, and I have been all of these nones at some point in my life. As the face of the church is changing and so many churches are beginning to dwindle away to nothing, we have to question what is it we can do differently? How do we get more people through the doors to hear God’s message? How do we act out the great commission, if we are all sitting in our cozy, comfortable place becoming more complacent every day? How do we get off our butts, and get out into the world and evangelize to these nones? How do we preserve God’s message and save the church from closing its doors further preventing the witness to nones? The no ways this is what I would classify as the number one church killer. We all have had hurts within the church, but sometimes we get so hurt we turn our back on the local church and sometimes our backs are turned on the global church. I first preached to adults at Smith Hill Baptist Church, a small country church right next to where I lived. My wife and I had been going there for a long time when the face of the church began to change. The church divided literally and figuratively, part of the church wanted to leave the Southern Baptist denomination and convert to Freewill Baptist. If you know anything about these two, you see there is a fundamental theological difference in salvation. Southern Baptist feel that once you are saved you are always saved, while Freewill believes that you can lose your salvation and fall out of grace with God. A divided church where the freewill side set on the right, and the Southern Baptist folks set on the left. Christmas time comes and time for the annual Christmas pageant that southern folks are so accustomed to. The problem is most of the kids of the church was on the left side, while the organizers were on the right side. The Christmas pageant was cast using children who did not attend our church, while the children of the families that did attend were left out. This was when I became a no way. Not one time in the ten years that followed not attending church did one single person ask me about my beliefs or share with me their story. It was my own self-realization of needing to be fed again that brought me back to church. More likely it was God making me realize I needed to be fed along with my family. In the book by James Krabill“ Is it Insensitive to Share Your Faith? Hard Questions about Christian Mission in a Plural World,” he states “People who have done the most to advance God’s Project in the world are those who have stood squarely and boldly in that central place of tension between two cultural realities and built bridges across the great divide.” [1] Reading this statement, caused me to think about our own denomination and how our testimony can promote and even hinder the growth of the church. The denomination is in turmoil rather we want to admit it or not, two factions against one another over one subject. It has been a source of conflict for a few years now, and no resolution has happened. Once a resolution has been reached then all parties involved should walk away feeling ok about the final resolution. That has not occurred, so how does this tie into our testimony and bridging the great divide? The subject matter of the GLQBT community and same-sex marriage is a volatile issue. Speaking of it can either gain support or opposition, rarely is there a middle ground on this matter. That is the problem there is no middle ground to speak of as of yet. The speaking that I mentioned is our testimony, we stand in front of the nation saying this is our testimony this is what we believe this is the love or the unlove that we represent. We need people who are not afraid to stand in the middle reach out to both sides and pull them together. This person has to be strong in their faith, and their testimony needs to be shored up. I have strong opinions on this subject, which I do not mind sharing, but not within the context of this paper. I do believe that my testimony once I finish honing the edges of it, can wield a mighty sword to show a different side of this conflict. There are others like me, who need to begin honing their testimony as well. Lillian Daniels did empower me I believe with this, she was not afraid to speak what she felt. I do not agree with how she went about doing it; I do feel she is not a bridge builder but someone who causes more conflict. In an earlier paper we had to reflect on what we would like to know more or ask of Lillian, now that I have had more time to process her writings and Krabill as well, I realize I have a much bigger question. How can you begin to build bridges and bring the church together to promote the kingdom, while you are creating conflict and speaking negatively about the ones who do not agree with you? At the beginning of this paper, that I started a day or so ago, I stated I had not gained anything from this course. I now realize that is complete fiction, that I have learned a lot from this course. However, putting it in writing is another story. I think the real question here is how do we bring conservative churches like Liberty Mills Church of the Brethren and progressive such as Beacon Heights together, unified under the banner of our Lord and Savior? Is this even possible? I have ties to both of the churches mentioned, and I can say that at this point the two could not be united for the kingdom. I will continue sharing my story, my testimony, my feelings and convictions and maybe one day; my story will be heard. Maybe one day someone will say this is dumb we are commanded to love everyone. Maybe one day this bridge will be built, and we can all meet in the middle join hands, raise them to the air, and proclaim that we are united to serve God and to promote his kingdom. So in summary, I realize I approached this course very close-minded in regards to the speaker. I realize I refused to believe that I could learn anything from her. I realize I saw her just like Westboro Baptist, but on the opposite side. What I did not realize is what I could learn from her, what I could get out of this course. That she may be like Westboro, but she is not afraid to share her convictions, and at least she does not do it with as much venom as Westboro. What I learned is, that the denomination and even the global church will never be united till more people are willing to stand in the deep dark trench that separates the two and begins to build that bridge. I realize that all my years in the Southern Baptist Church that I felt had brainwashed me with their flawed hatred at times, actually strengthens my testimony. I am no longer fearful of other people’s thoughts or opinions; I am only afraid of letting my God down. I challenge you to begin to hone your testimony, to take it out wield it with confidence. The confidence that only God can give you, stand for what you believe in, and begin to bridge the divide. In the words of Paul in the letter he wrote to the people of southern Galatia states “There is no Jew or Greek, slave or free, male or female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Maybe in the near future, the verse can be written as, there is no Jew or Greek, slave or free, queer or straight, but we are all one in Christ Jesus. Until that time, I will continue honing my sword, and battle for equality.     [1] Krabill, J. R. (2005). It is insensitive to share your faith? Good Books.